My Picasso is Dirty, Grab the Wonder Bread!!!

Here is a WILD tip we read about in our favorite magazine, Real Simple.  Next time your Van Gogh is too dusty to show, grab a slice of white sandwich bread!  Yes, pick your jaw up off the desk we are talking about Wonder Bread and it's ilk.  Not sourdough, not dark rye, not pita, not focaccia.  Take the slice and glide it over the surface of your oil painting to remove dirt and dust.

Get Soft (Butter) Quicker!

Here is a great idea we found in a magazine that we thought would pass along to all our loyal readers!

So many recipes call for softened butter, but who has the time these days to wait for two sticks to reach room temperature?  Connie does (we pay her for that), but we don't.  Next time you need to thaw your butter in a flutter, you have two options.  The first is the obvious idea of sticking it in the microwave.  Zap it on low for 20 second intervals.  The butter is ready when it is malleable but not runny.  The second idea is to take the sticks and cut them into small chunks and set them on the counter for 10 to 15 minutes while you prepare other ingredients.  The smaller size and additional surface area will help the butter warm to room temperature quickly!

Odds and Ends

Here are a few miscellaneous must knows!

- Use dental floss (similar to the way a potter slices clay) to cut a cake layer.
- Use a hairdryer to remove stubborn price stickers from glass.
- Remove permanent marker from walls and counter tops with rubbing alcohol on a cotton ball.
- To prevent shoe strings from coming untied, rub lip balm where you tie the knot and they will stay put.
- If you don't have a camera case, store your pocket digital camera in a soap case.  This is handy when traveling or in your purse.
- Defog your goggles with toothpaste.

Nail Polish Niblets

Here is a few ideas we collected!  If you are confused about some of them, leave us a comment and we will gladly help you!

- Used to nail polish as a button securer. You can sew that loose button on later.
- Use clear nail polish to hold the screw in your eyeglasses longer.
- To keep your faux pearls from flaking.
- Color code keys.
- To prevent shaving cream cans from leaving rust rings in your tub or shower.
- Seal an envelope.
- Nail Polish Remover rubbed on the base of the cap of a glue bottle, will make opening it easier.

Lady Godiva and The Jarlsberg Chronicles...

We are beginning our blog today with a "true" adventure!  Connie, Kathleen, and I (Michael) were walking down Main Street in Whereverville, USA when a hooded figure plowed through us at a high rate of speed!  Unfortunately, Connie didn't see him coming because she has to wear double eye patches since the glitter accident a few weeks back. (The doctors tell us she will regain full vision in both eyes.)  Shortly thereafter a red faced, vintage Gouda vendor chased the hooded offender.  He screamed, "I will not be among the 3%!!!!".  As we picked Connie up out of the well groomed evergreens, Kathleen and I looked at each other in puzzlement. (Who knows what Connie was looking at?)  The offender, moving quickly for a man with pants full of cheese rounded the corner and was gone.  The panting vendor, stopped near us.  "What happened?" we inquired.  He told us the most fascinating fact.  The most frequently stolen food in the world is CHEESE!  More than 3% of the world's supply of cheese is stolen each year!  He shook his head and returned back to the Parmesan Palace but not before asking us a question.  "What's the deal with the woman with double eye patches?"  "Don't ask" we replied, shaking our heads.  The whole time, mind you, Connie was sitting on the pavement asking "What happened, what happened?  Why does it smell so Gouda out hear?"

Having witnessed such a senseless crime against fermented milk, we had to have a chocolate fix!  Luckily we happened to be walking by Lady Godiva's Confection Collection and we ducked in (dragging Connie).  As we entered the cocoa cave, a sweet, mild-mannered, sample girl stopped us dead in our tracks with a tray of goodies.  As we scarfed down a few treats (and fed Connie one or two) she offered up this tasty nugget (of info).  "Did you know that people who indulge in chocolate more than twice a week are 37% less likely to develop cardiovascular disease!"  Our hearts regained their normal rhythm, and we quickly thanked the girl and made a mad dash before we had to buy anything!

The things you learn when you take Connie for a walk!!!

::HOW TO KILL YOUR PET::

Happy New Year Everyone!  We only have 12 minutes before the office closes so here is a very quick and informative post on common human foods you might have around the house that may be toxic and even deadly to your pets!

-Alcohol (The kind you drink you booze hound!)
-Grapes
-Onions and Garlic (Sorry Italians!)
-Chocolates (Sorry over stressed housewives)
-Sugarless Gum (Sorry dentists!)

We are sure there are more so consult your vet for details!

SLICK USES FOR COOKING SPRAY

We are sure you have been using cooking spray like it's going out of style this holiday season making all those yummy treats!  Here are several unique alternate uses for cooking spray that we, Connie, and the rest of the design staff have complied!

-Shred Cheese in a Breeze: Before you use your cheese grater, spray it was non-stick cooking spray to prevent chunks forming and for easy clean up.  It's Gouda!

-Move That Honey Like A Bunny: Spray the inside of your measuring cups or spoons when you are measuring sticking liquids such as honey, molasses, corn syrup, Maple syrup, etc.

-Shovel With Out Trouble: We all know that we are going to have loads of snow to shovel soon.  Make it easier by spraying your shovel with cooking spray. Sticky snow and ice will slide right off! Connie always says "When snow starts to stick, make your shovel slick!" 

- Finger Food Freedom: The next time you are making a meatloaf, rolling cookie dough into balls, or making popcorn balls.  Spritz your hands with cooking spray; Connie also says "You're fingers will be free from ick really quick!"

-Unpry Your Rye: Next time you are baking a loaf of bread and need to let it rise, spray the bowl with cooking spray to help avoid pesky sticky dough all over your bowl.  Connie says "When yeast is a beast, spray to release!"

-Lube Your Lock: If your lock starts to stick and your don't know how to pick, try some non-stick.  Spray your key and insert into the lock.  Next, wiggle it around.  This will lubricate the internal mechanisms. Connie even uses it on her hinges, garden tools, or scissors.

-Don't Be Stainer In Your Plastic Container:  Next time you take leftover spaghetti and meatballs to work for lunch, first spray your plastic storage container with a thin coating of cooking spray.  This prevents discoloration!

Our staff wishes you happy holidays and reminds you of one more use for your cooking spray.  Spray the inside of your chimney with cooking spray to help jolly old Saint Nick slip in and out quickly***

***Do not ACTUALLY spray the inside of your chimney, you might start a fire ( and we're talking about you, Billy Joel). The staff at CELEBRATE! is not responsible for any house fires.