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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Lady Godiva and The Jarlsberg Chronicles...

We are beginning our blog today with a "true" adventure!  Connie, Kathleen, and I (Michael) were walking down Main Street in Whereverville, USA when a hooded figure plowed through us at a high rate of speed!  Unfortunately, Connie didn't see him coming because she has to wear double eye patches since the glitter accident a few weeks back. (The doctors tell us she will regain full vision in both eyes.)  Shortly thereafter a red faced, vintage Gouda vendor chased the hooded offender.  He screamed, "I will not be among the 3%!!!!".  As we picked Connie up out of the well groomed evergreens, Kathleen and I looked at each other in puzzlement. (Who knows what Connie was looking at?)  The offender, moving quickly for a man with pants full of cheese rounded the corner and was gone.  The panting vendor, stopped near us.  "What happened?" we inquired.  He told us the most fascinating fact.  The most frequently stolen food in the world is CHEESE!  More than 3% of the world's supply of cheese is stolen each year!  He shook his head and returned back to the Parmesan Palace but not before asking us a question.  "What's the deal with the woman with double eye patches?"  "Don't ask" we replied, shaking our heads.  The whole time, mind you, Connie was sitting on the pavement asking "What happened, what happened?  Why does it smell so Gouda out hear?"

Having witnessed such a senseless crime against fermented milk, we had to have a chocolate fix!  Luckily we happened to be walking by Lady Godiva's Confection Collection and we ducked in (dragging Connie).  As we entered the cocoa cave, a sweet, mild-mannered, sample girl stopped us dead in our tracks with a tray of goodies.  As we scarfed down a few treats (and fed Connie one or two) she offered up this tasty nugget (of info).  "Did you know that people who indulge in chocolate more than twice a week are 37% less likely to develop cardiovascular disease!"  Our hearts regained their normal rhythm, and we quickly thanked the girl and made a mad dash before we had to buy anything!

The things you learn when you take Connie for a walk!!!


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